Love in the Time of Facebook

Allow me to beat the vestiges of 2010's Christmas/New Year spirit out of your system by broaching a topic nearer that occasion we all love to dread: Valentines.

Social media analysts have recently explored how Facebook has changed the way romance unfolds between couples. In fact, they listed 5 ways Facebook changed dating (for the worse):

1. Overanalyzing a significant other's (or a crush's) posts will drive you crazy.

>>> This one made me smirk because I have a friend (not the hypothetical one that turns out to be me) who created a fiction in her mind that she was in a relationship with a guy. The two of them encountered each other frequently but the extent of their conversation was to exchange nods of hello's. Yet she swore that his every facebook post pertained to her. She read between the lines, letters, spaces - you name it, she read her name into it. It was an arduous process but she eventually realized the error of her ways.

2. You see all the action your Ex is getting.

>> Well... You can also see all the inaction they're getting, right?

3. Relationships and breakups are public.

>> There was a time when it was cruel and heartless to break up over the phone, over instant messaging or through a letter. It was cold and cowardly - or so we used to think. Now, it's becoming a social trend to break up via Facebook posts. Imagine finding out that your significant other left you by seeing his/her Facebook status as "In a Relationship with [someone else]."

>> On the other end, changing your Facebook status from "Single" to "In a Relationship" has become a relationship milestone along the same lines as proposing, being accepted, sharing that first kiss, and going on the first date.

4. It's a record of every relationship mistake you've ever made.

>> Oh yes, that "See older posts" link can be used for evil. Beware.

5. Other people's comments will make your date jealous.

>> Not only will comments cause fights but they can even lead to breakups.

I wonder, has Facebook given a venue for the mindset that relationships are transient? Whatever happened to Joshua Harris' theories on kissing aimless dating goodbye?

Maricris L. Real

Entry #7